The Fear of Rejection

Naturally, the fear of making significant requests is prevalent. It exposes you to vulnerability. As Seth Godin articulates in his book "The Icarus Deception," our societal tendency is to wait for someone to select us and give us a sense of validation.

If you’re waiting to be chosen, you could be waiting indefinitely. The worst outcome from making a significant ask is typically just a modest rejection. If you desire something, don’t hesitate to ask. Whether it’s sending a cold email, approaching a professor post-lecture, or scheduling a chat with your supervisor, seize the opportunity.

Ask big things from influential people, and you might just be surprised by the results.

Serendipity Requires Action

Moonshots are aptly named, and it’s likely that your email may go unnoticed. However, we need to consider the potential positive outcomes. If there's even a 5% chance that your request could alter your career trajectory in a favorable way, it’s worth taking that chance.

You’ll never experience serendipity if you maintain a 0% chance of success. It only happens to those who are willing to take risks, even if it’s just a tiny probability.

The Games We Choose to Play

Perhaps my friend wasn't merely waiting for permission. Maybe he subconsciously didn’t want that research position — he assumed he should want it because others did.

Time is limited. Your major requests should reflect the games you wish to engage in. You have a choice: will you pursue the approval of others, or will you forge your own path and advance your own cause?

Utilizing Your Downtime Wisely

Let’s take this further. Instead of merely asking, focus on doing. If there’s a project you’ve been postponing, now is the moment to take the initiative. Start with the first step.

You don’t need to occupy your free time sending cold emails for internships. Use that time to create something of your own. Develop your product, build your audience, or refine your skills.

Alternatively, maybe you need a break. You don’t have to fill every spare moment with activities just because others are. Discover your own rhythm. But whatever you choose, don’t wait for someone else to tell you it’s acceptable to act.

If you’re seeking permission, consider this your green light.

Stop hesitating. Start asking. Start doing.

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